In Search of a Mary Heart - Part 2

Continued from yesterday. 

Mary of Bethany

We all know the story of Mary and Martha and their sisterly spat on which was most important—preparing a meal or listening to Jesus. (Luke 10:38-42) Jesus said that Mary made the best choice—to sit at His feet. 

But how does that work when I have laundry to fold, dishes to wash, Christmas rolls to bake, and bathrooms to clean? Reading my Bible all day just isn't an option.

From other Scriptures in the Bible, we learn that Mary and Martha's house was a regular meeting place for Jesus and his disciples. I assume that both sisters spent many hours hosting guests. The fact that Martha was irked to find Mary shirking her duties on this occasion tells me that usually Mary was right beside Martha chopping vegetables and washing mugs.

Service can be a way to worship God. 

Jesus did not condemn Martha for serving food—just pointed out her bad attitude. Martha was “troubled” in her service. Maybe if Martha would have spent time listening to Jesus with Mary she would have served with joy. Gordon MacDonald said that “the inner world of the spiritual must govern the outer world of activity.”

Each day I make decisions on how I use my time. I need to choose between many good options to find the best, especially at Christmas. There are not enough hours in the season to do everything that I want to do.

Last summer I repainted a few rooms and discovered just how much Stuff we had accumulated. After painting, I added back to the room only what I deemed necessary or meaningful. We ended up getting rid of some furniture and many boxes of books, and rehung only half the wall decorations. Less Stuff gave a feeling of freedom, cleanliness, and quiet. (Though with six children our home isn't often clean or quiet.) 

Could I do the same with my schedule? What would my December look like if I shook out the calendar, dumped out all the holiday traditions, quit listening to the voices of obligation/guilt/expectation, and then added back to December only what was necessary, meaningful, and worshipful?

Does it mean I would quit baking Christmas cookies, throw out the candles, and skip the family reunion? Not necessarily. Those things can be part of living out my life of service and worship. I can bake cookies for a fun activity with my children. I can light a candle on the table and invite others to join in the warmth of shared conversation. I can attend a reunion and strengthen family ties. But I can also decide that none of those things will be priorities this year because, for whatever reason, God is calling me to lay aside this particular Martha activity to make time and energy for Mary worship.

Looking at my priorities may mean clearing the schedule of some enjoyable activities to make time for what is truly important. If my fun day of shopping makes me too tired for the church caroling in the evening, I haven't chosen well. If I spend my afternoon chasing the children out of the kitchen so I can create a lovely meal for guests, I have Martha's troubled spirit. When I'm racing the clock, my voice sharpens, my chest tightens, and I know my priorities are skewed. Except for rare times of true emergency, I don't think God meant us to live in panic mode.

I have a tendency to accumulate traditions. We make gingerbread houses one year and think we need to do it every year. But time is limited and to keep the schedule (and me) sane, I must eliminate something every time I add an activity.

I can also learn from Mary and Martha to accept others who have made different choices. What is overwhelming to me might be relaxing to another. I love that we are not cookie-cutter gingerbread ladies, and I want to enjoy each woman's talents without comparison or judgment.

Look for the final part of this article tomorrow.

In Search of a Mary Heart - Part 1

This article was published in the winter 2016 issue of Daughters of Promise magazine. Daughters of Promise shares the art, photography, and writing of a talented group of volunteers from a wide variety of Mennonite backgrounds. The magazine isn't cheap, but with over 100 gorgeous full-color pages and inspiring articles (and no ads) I anticipate each issue. Find more information at the DOP website.

In Search of a Mary Christmas

I love Christmas. I love the music, the whispered secrets, the yummy food, and the glittering lights. 

I say I'm celebrating the birth of Jesus, but sometimes when I'm scouring Pinterest for craft ideas, printing off another Christmas cookie recipe, and sighing over the pictures of beautiful table decorations in the pages of Southern Living, I wonder what Jesus would think of my celebration.

Is my Christmas any different than society's holiday? If you evaluated my calendar, credit card statement, and to-do list what would you discern about my priorities? Would you know that the goal of my Christmas (and my life) is to lift up the name of Christ? I might not max out my credit cards or wake up with a headache from the spiked eggnog, but too often my Christmas is centered on me.

There must be more to Christmas than uncounted calories, the pressure to find the perfect gift, and a dozen opportunities to catch the latest version of the flu. Unhappy with my me-centered holiday I began to look for ways to have less worry and more worship in December. I studied three women in the Bible named Mary who knew Jesus while He was here on earth. These women's lives were changed by Jesus. Maybe my Christmas could be changed by their stories.

Mary, the Mother of Jesus

With the angel's words, “thou art highly favoured, . . . thou shalt bring forth a son,” (Luke 1:28) Mary's plans shattered. To mother the Messiah, the Promised One? This honor meant the end of a normal life for a Galilean girl, but Mary shows no hesitancy. Her answer was immediate. “Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word.”

Mary did not base her decision on what was popular or what would promote her in the Nazareth society. Carrying this baby made her the next possible victim for a public stoning. Mary gave up her dreams of a perfect wedding and the expectations of her firstborn's birth. Because of an oppressive tax law, her baby was born far from home in crude surroundings without even the comfort of a mom or sister to assist with the birth. That first Christmas wasn't twinkling lights and warm, fuzzy emotions. While Mary traveled from Nazareth to Bethlehem to Egypt and back again, I wonder if she was tempted to compare her crazy life with her friends' “perfect” lives.

Last year I waddled into Christmas with a due date in early January. My calendar was full with weekly prenatal visits. I had zero energy, limped with every step, and looked like I should stay home with an ice pack and a Tylenol. But I enjoyed a more peaceful, less frantic, more meaningful Christmas than usual.

The difference? Expectations.

Our culture places a lot of expectations on us women. I coddle daydreams of the picture-perfect Christmas: crackling fires, ten kinds of Christmas cookies, and a fun schedule with holiday concerts, cookie swaps, shopping, family reunions, and church events. When I can't keep up, I start comparing myself with all the talented ladies who appear to get it all done.

The disappointment of dashed expectations curdles the enjoyment of December and is often the enemy of my peace. But last year I felt no pressure to attend every event possible. I made plans with the caveat “if we can make it.” I didn't expect to do everything, so what I did accomplish was a treat, a gift. And for once I wasn't comparing myself with others.

Alexander Pope said, "Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed." He might be right, though I prefer David's take on expectations. "My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him." (Psalm 62:5) 

There is One, only One, who never disappoints. If I, like Mary, “ponder these things in my heart,” maybe I can build expectations on the One who won't leave me feeling frustrated. I want to give up my idealistic expectations every year, not just when I'm nine months pregnant. 

Continued tomorrow

Music of Christmas

The music is one of my favorite parts of the Christmas season. Every year I seem to have a different favorite song, but I always enjoy revisiting with old friends.

Here are some videos of some of my favorite Christmas music. Some of these videos I look forward to listening/watching each year.

(If you are reading this by email or feed reader you may need to click over to the blog to view the videos.)



How Should a King Come? (My children's favorite.)



In the Bleak Midwinter (This one makes me tear up.)




Hallelujah Chorus (Another that my children beg to listen to each December)



O Love That Will Not Let Me Go (Not a Christmas song,  but one of my all-time favorite songs sung in a new recording by Oasis.)

What songs are you humming?

More Favorite Christmas Stories

We couldn't wait. Before we had turned the calendar to December, my children had pulled out our stack of Christmas books. I plan to reserve a few of our favorites from the library later this month. I try to be careful not to keep Christmas books too long so that others can enjoy them as well. 

Several years ago I shared several lists of Christmas books. But since then I've discovered some more books, so today I'm sharing an all-new list of favorite children's picture books about Christmas. 

And as always, I'd love to hear what you are reading. 

The Third Gift by Linda Sue Park, illustrated by Bagram Ibatoulline

A young boy learns his father's craft of harvesting “tears” of myrrh. A special surprise at the end connects it with the Christmas story. Beautiful illustrations.

Papa Panov's Special Day by Mig Holder Illustrated by Julie Downing

A lonely shoemaker waits for a special visitor on Christmas Day. A classic Russian tale, popularized by Leo Tolstoy, is retold with excellent illustrations.

 

Lucy's Christmas by Donald Hall, illustrated by Michael McCurdy

In 1909 in New Hampshire, a young girl prepares for Christmas by making gifts for her family and friends. Based on the life of the author's mother, this is a warm look at life a hundred years ago. The wood engraved illustrations add to the old fashioned charm.

One Candle by Eve Bunting

A family's Hanukkah celebration remembers the dark days of the Holocaust. Beautiful story of perseverance with lovely illustrations.

Annika’s Secret Wish by Beverly Lewis, Illustrated by Pamela Querin

Annika hopes that this is the year that she will find the almond in her pudding. Take a journey to Sweden and enjoy a special Christmas celebration and the joy of giving. Dazzling illustrations bring the joy of Sweden to life.

Toot and Puddle: Let It Snow by Holly Hobbie

Toot and Puddle search for the perfect gift to make for each other. A sweet Christmas story about friendship with delightful watercolor illustrations.

Winter’s Gift by Jane Monroe Donovan

A lost horse and a lonely man meet at Christmas to share the hope of new life. Warm paintings add to the beauty of this lovely Christmas tale.

Check out the past lists for more holiday reading.
Favorite Adult Christmas Books

Christmas Chapter Books for Children

Christmas Stories from Other Times and Places

Favorite  Christmas Books for Children

This post contains affiliate links.

Games for the Whole Family

Last night we had a comfy Sunday evening at home. We didn't have church and because of our coughs (which have been hanging on for Weeks) we decided to not make any other plans.

Our lovely fall weather abruptly changed to freezing temperatures and howling winds this weekend, and Ed started a fire in the fireplace. We got out hymn books and enjoyed singing (until the coughing made us curtail that activity), read out loud (but that is hard to do coughing too), and enjoyed some games.

It reminded me how much I enjoy winter evenings. Our family loves outdoor activities like hiking and biking, but there is something special about indoor activities on cold winter evenings.

My mother-in-law has blessed us with some great games for our children's birthdays. In case you are looking for some new family games, here is a list of some of our favorites, starting with the very easiest to play and moving to harder games.



Can You See What I See?
This is a current favorite of our two-year-old. The bright cards are irresistible.



Too Many Monkeys
I think all of our five-year-olds have went through a stage that this was their favorite game. It can be played by non-readers, but a little more challenging than Uno.



Quirkle
Another game that non-readers can play but appeals to all ages. This might be my favorite on the list. There is just enough variety to each game to keep it interesting yet it isn't too mind stretching for a weary, side-tracked mom.



Dutch Blitz
Ed teaches my children the classic games such as checkers, Monopoly, chess, and scrabble. I'm glad he does because I'm too hyper to enjoy games of strategy. Dutch Blitz has been my favorite for years because you don't need to take turns. Everyone lays out cards at the same time.


Blokus
Another game that is fun for all ages. We have the travel version that is played by only two people, but there are many other versions.



Apples to Apples
My oldest daughter's favorite. A game of crazy comparisons.





Rummikub
Sometimes the old games are the best. Rummikub is a current family favorite. Create sets and runs with tiles, then build on the other players' tiles. Fast moving enough for even me.




Taboo
Describe a word, without using a list of words. This one is difficult for those like me who talk without thinking, but good practice in communication skills.

What games are your family playing?

(This post contains affiliate links.)

Q/A: Gift Ideas for Children

I just realized today that Thanksgiving is next week. Don't ask where I've been, but obviously not somewhere that has a calendar. Maybe in the laundry room?

We try to keep Christmas simple at our home - especially in the gift giving department. But we do like to find a special gift for each of our children. Our children also like to give small gifts to their siblings. This year for the first time, our four oldest children exchanged names so that they only have one sibling to buy/make something for. I admit that I suggested a name exchange mostly for my own sanity as I usually get the task of helping come up with ideas. Four children times four. Too much for this mom's brain.

Recently a Home Joys reader asked for some gift ideas for older girls. I thought I'd share some of my ideas in hopes that all of you would contribute some more ideas.

For our older children we have attempted to find gifts that would help build skills or give experiences. We want gifts that are not just going to add to the clutter of our house or feed the "gimmie" attitude.

I'm not sure how well we have succeeded, but here are some ideas we've done in the past.

1. Crochet hook and yarn with some directions for an easy project such as a scarf.

2. Binoculars for a budding bird watcher.

3. Wood working tools with scrap wood, paint, and nails for hours of creativity. (And this can be for both boys and girls.)

4. Leatherworking kits.

5. Whittling knives and whittling book.

6. Para-cord and knot-tying book.
(I wrote about our favorite whittling and knot-tying book here.)

7. Scrapbooking supplies with some photos.

8. Music instruments. We've given simple instruments such as a harmonica and a ukulele. Music lessons could also be given for an experience type gift.

Games are also a gift that our children enjoy and can be enjoyed by the whole family. But maybe I'll save our favorite games for another post.

Shari did a recent post on inexpensive gift ideas with a focus on younger children. Check out her list for some great ideas.

Your turn. Do you have any good non-clutter gift ideas for children?

Sourdough Biscuits

I can probably trace my interest in sourdough to reading By the Shores of Silver Lake by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I longed to have a taste of her famous sourdough biscuits. This recipe is different than what is described in the book, but of the various sourdough biscuit recipes I have tried, this is our favorite.

So pretend you are Ma Ingalls and make sourdough biscuits for breakfast. We love these with sausage gravy for breakfast.

Sourdough Biscuits

1 cup active starter
2 cups milk
1/4 cup melted butter or oil
2 cups whole wheat flour
1 T. honey
2 1/2 cups white flour
2 tsp salt
1 T. baking powder
1 tsp baking soda

The night before, mix the starter, milk, butter, and whole wheat flour together. Stir well, cover, and sit overnight at room temperature.

The next morning add honey to mixture. Mix white flour, salt, baking powder, and baking soda together. Stir the dry ingredients into starter mixture. Mix quickly then pour onto a well-floured counter.

Knead briefly, just enough to smooth and shape into a ball. The dough should be sticky. Flatten dough to about 1-inch thick. Cut biscuits with a three-inch cutter. Place in a 400 degree oven for about 15 minutes. Serve hot with butter and honey or sausage gravy.



Looking for more sourdough goodness?  It is all on the sourdough page.