Thanks so much to each one who has messaged me to say that you are thinking of us over this Christmas season, the first without Ed.
Sometimes silence on this blog means I'm struggling, but this past month we have just been busy. We've stuffed our days full of cookie baking, caroling, and gatherings with friends and family, besides the normal homeschooling and household work.
I'm tempted to think my life is busier than most, until I talk to others who appear equally busy. And I know most of my busyness is self-inflicted, the result of my choices. I always find time for friends and books, even if it is never enough, so my life is rich.
Last night we arrived home from spending Christmas Eve at my parents to find several packages inside our door including a box of donuts. Some packages had labels (we puzzled how some blog readers from British Columbia delivered a large package), but the givers of other packages is still a mystery. Since it was nearly midnight, we fell into our beds, but this morning the children enjoyed the carefully chosen presents. Another reminder of how much we have been given this Christmas.
But we also have reminders of how broken we are.
Ed proposed on Christmas Eve, the best gift I was ever given. There is nothing that can fill that gap.
This morning, before I was barely awake, I read the message that another godly man had ended his painful journey with cancer. When he had shook my hand at Ed's viewing I never imagined that he would be gone by Christmas himself. Sometimes it is hard for me to cry for myself, but today I cried for his family and their pain-filled Christmas day.
My friend Stephanie wrote yesterday, "Christmas isn’t for the merry. Christmas is for the broken."
Jesus didn't come so that we could enjoy a crackling fireplace with a favorite book and a cup of cocoa in a new pottery mug. He came so that miserable people with no hope of anything but pain and death in their future, could have the hope of life and joy.
Below I share an unfamiliar carol that speaks of grieving people who long to find light in their darkness.
I hope you have joy this Christmas, but if you are more familiar with pain than parties, may you hear God's Word speaking peace to your heart.
Veiled in Darkness Judah Lay
By Richard Douglas
Veiled in darkness Judah lay, waiting for the promised day,
While across the shadowy night streamed a flood of glorious light,
Heavenly voices chanting then, “Peace on earth, good will to men;”
Heavenly voices chanting then, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
While across the shadowy night streamed a flood of glorious light,
Heavenly voices chanting then, “Peace on earth, good will to men;”
Heavenly voices chanting then, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
Still the earth in darkness lies. Up from death’s dark vale arise
Voices of a world in grief, prayers of men who seek relief.
Now the darkness pierce again, “Peace on earth, good will to men;”
Now the darkness pierce again, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
Voices of a world in grief, prayers of men who seek relief.
Now the darkness pierce again, “Peace on earth, good will to men;”
Now the darkness pierce again, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
Light of light, we humbly pray, shine upon Thy world today;
Break the gloom of our dark night, fill our souls with love and light,
Send Thy blessed Word again, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
Send Thy blessed Word again, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
Break the gloom of our dark night, fill our souls with love and light,
Send Thy blessed Word again, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”
Send Thy blessed Word again, “Peace on earth, good will to men.”