Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Review - Silent Grief: Hope for Surviving Early Miscarriage

Several years ago I discovered Kendra Graber's blog. Soon after, Kendra had a miscarriage. I appreciated some of the things she wrote over that time of grief.

Kendra knows first hand a mother's hidden sorrow of miscarriage. She is determined not to waste her experience with four miscarriages but to use them to encourage others.

Kendra has written a short book called Silent Grief: Hope for Surviving Early Miscarriage. In her book she tells her story - and the story of her lost babies. She includes insight from Scripture on the sacred God-given life in each unborn baby. One chapter of the book covers the physical aspects of a miscarriage.

Kendra also includes the stories of many other women who have lost babies through miscarriage. If you have ever felt alone, this section proves that you are not. Many other women have walked through this same valley.

Silent Grief also includes a section on how to help a friend who had a miscarriage. Sometimes it is hard to know what to say or do but this gives practical advice.

Silent Grief will be a valuable book for any woman to read, whether or not you have experienced a miscarriage yourself. It underlines the value of each baby in the sight of God. With just over 50 pages, it is a quick read.

For many, Mother's Day is a reminder of broken dreams. My heart aches when I think of some of you who I know personally who long for your lost baby. I well remember my own heartbreak twelve years ago when our first child's life ended so quickly. I wish I would have had a resource like this back then.


Silent Grief is available in e-book format - either in Kindle or pdf. I found it easy to download and read as a pdf on my computer.  At only $2.99, it is a great deal. Order at Kendra's blog, Living in the Shoe

Kendra is hoping to sometime have a papervack version also available for gift-giving. Check back at her blog for updates on future availability.

Kendra gave me a free copy of Silent Grief to review but the opinions stated here are my own.


  1. Thank you, Gina, for this post!! I wanted to quick reply that, Lord willing, we will have Silent Grief into print within a week. We are also going to be offering it as a matching gift set with a beautiful journal, bookmark, and magnet - all designed to give to a mother suffering a miscarriage.

    If your readers are wanting to know exactly when it will be available, all I can say is to check back on the blog within a week - or sign up for our newsletter since we will probably post it there asap.

    Thanks again! And have an awesome summer. :)

    God bless.

    ~ Kendra

    1. Kendra-
      Oh, I love the idea of making it a gift set! Thanks again for reaching out to women in this way.

  2. It always amazes me how many women act as though a miscarriage is no big deal! (they have never been there) This is going to be a wonderful resource for many, including those women who are active in women's ministries in their churches. I know I am always looking for a new way to say 'I care', and to comfort! Thanks for posting the info.

  3. Thank you so much for linking to this and telling about this book - I'm going to go check out her site. I just lost my 5th baby and this was the most devastating for us as I was 5 months pregnant. My dream has always been to have a large family but I'm sadly realizing that they may not be possible for me. I do have 2 children - an 11 year old and a 2 year old thankfully that made it through! My 11-yr old didn't have a heartbeat at 38 weeks but after 3 days - her heartbeat came back!!! She was my miracle baby. Then, my son barely made it out as we almost lost him several times during the pregnancy.

    1. Bev-
      I am so sorry. It is hard to see the death of your dream. I pray that you will feel the comfort of the Lord in this time.

  4. I, too wish that I had a resource like this when I lost my second baby to miscarriage. No one even told me that I would go through any grief, depression, and also post partum changes. I was not aware that I would go through things like sweating and hot flashes and other changes. I wish that my doctor had outlined what I might expect. I also wish that others would understand more about miscarriage. I receieved many well-intentioned but hurtful comments like "are you going to try again?" or "at least you already have one child" or "at least its not like ____ who had 9 miscarriages and never had a child who lived" etc. I wish people had simply said "I am so sorry, I will pray for you" or something similar.

    1. I am so sorry that you didn't have the support you needed. Hopefully you can be that caring kind of person to someone who is faced with a similar grief.

    2. I understand what you are saying as I felt the same way and people did say things that hurt but I realized that they just don't understand that what they are saying hurts. A lot told me "So what? You have 2, why do you care?" I was not ready for this response but so many said it that I realized that they truly did not get it and I was able to forgive them and not let it make me bitter. I found my greatest support from those that had experienced what I had - a friend that lost a baby at 12 weeks, comforted me with prayer and a picture of Jesus of holding a baby, to help me visualize and it touched me that she even cared about what I was going through! Other friends avoided me completely and still do but I've read about this and it is a well-known reaction by people because they don't know what to say, so they avoid you. It still hurts though but God is helping me give them a pass! God is my greatest comfort - I wouldn't have made it through this last one without his constant comfort.

  5. The warm fireplaceMay 14, 2015 at 5:13 AM

    I too lost my first baby at 13 weeks to miscarriage, had two babies then nearly lost my son at 13 weeks again, this time technology had moved on and they were able to tell that the plancenta was half away, with total rest for 5 months i had him early at 36 weeks,this book would have been so helpful. Evenly though it was 31 years ago i never forget that i have a missing child, the grief is still there, God is good and has given me comfort over the years. My heart goes out to all the ladies who have suffered miscarriages.


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